It has been my observation that Romance 'N' the Net can be heart breaking and dangerous. If you're easily hurt or too trusting, you may be looking for love in the wrong place. Don't get me wrong. I know it has worked for some people. I even know a few couples personally who met online, got married and are still a happy couple today. But there are people out there looking for someone to deliberately hurt. The following are my personal viewpoints so please keep that in mind as you read on.
Romance 'N' the Net can fool you into believing everything that you read. I have seen many people deeply hurt by someone they trusted when they discovered that what they were led to believe was all lies. Take me for instance. I'm male because I say I am. But am I? I'm single because I say I am. But am I? You don't really have much choice other than to believe me, do you? Well, I am a single female. Really, I am. If you're not quite sure then good for you. You're not overly trusting of everything you read on the net.
I personally believe that most people are basically honest. There are some people who may not be willing to tell you everything about themselves. Do you consider it a lie if someone doesn't disclose everything about themselves? If it's not written on a page or in an email, how can their not telling you something be a lie? Perhaps they were going to tell you later when the time was right. But right for who? You? Them? It's not a good idea to tell all anyway. You have to protect yourself from unscrupulous people. Maybe, just maybe, the other person doesn't trust you completely and is protecting themselves. Go figure, huh? Someone may not trust you completely!
I don't see how a person can fall in love with someone they only know from the net. Wait, don't get angry at me! I said fall in love, not love. I love all of my online friends. I'm sure you love your online friends too. I'll admit that I care about a certain online friend a lot. Hey, I'm human just like the rest of you. Am I in love with him? My answer is no, not at this moment in time. I've never met the man in person and I believe that it is important that I do. Who knows, that could change one day. And maybe not. If, or when, the right person comes along I'll know it. But for it to work out it will be because both of us share the same feelings and have things in common. That's the way it works.
We weren't created to be alone. I'm not getting any younger and don't want to end my days alone. But if I have to I'm at peace with that. I'd much rather be with someone who cares as much about me as I care about them. It's human nature to care about others. We all need to have someone to care about us and we also need to care about others. We would be pretty miserable if that weren't true, don't you agree?
To be in love with someone is very different from loving someone. It takes time to get to know someone well enough to be in love with them. Ask anyone you know that met their partner online and they'll probably tell you the same thing. When you build a house you have to start with the foundation, don't you? To build on love you have to start with a good foundation also. You need to have some things in common. I know it's been said that opposites attract. I believe that to be true up to a point. Opposites often diplay traits that we wish we had and we want to be around that person. But if there is no common ground it won't last. The very things that attracted you will become the things you don't like about the other person.
Newly widowed and recently divorced women can often be easy prey for stalkers on the net looking to get their jollies. Also people who have inherited large sums of money can become victims of false flattery and lies. It's real easy to get to a person who is grieving over the loss of a loved one or a lost love. I've seen it happen too many times. How can that happen you may wonder? How can anyone know anything about me? People talk. You know how things spread from one end of town to the other don't you? Imagine how quickly things can spread on the net. You have to learn to not be to trusting and reveal to much about yourself until you get to know someone very well. Not everyone is your friend. Not everyone cares about your feelings. All of the above doesn't necessarily apply to women only. Men should watch out for themselves too.
My advice to you is to be careful when you're Romance 'N' the Net. You need to get to know the other person well. You need to be sure the things they're telling you are true. If you're not sure, then do what you can to check their story. Don't make yourself vunerable by disclosing everything about yourself too soon. Take time to build a relationship one block at a time. You also need to meet the other person in person. Keep in mind that just because you think it's right for you it may not be right for someone else. Take all the time you need to be sure it's right for you and the other person. Don't go with just attraction. You need to have things in common for it to last. No one likes getting hurt, don't you agree? So why leave yourself open to be hurt or for you to hurt someone else? Honesty is the best policy. Be up front. If you're not interested in someone who wants more than you're willing to give let them know so both of you will understand the limitations on the friendship. Enjoy your online friendships but be cautious when Romance 'N' the Net.
Do I take my own advice on Romance 'N' the Net seriously? You bet I do! I don't leave myself vunerable to unscrupulous people. I know my self-worth and that of others. I do not want to be hurt and don't want to hurt anyone else either. How about you? You don't want to leave yourself open to a lot of heartache and pain do you?
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